When dads are free to care, moms are freer to soar.
He changes diapers.
He reads bedtime stories.
He juggles Zoom meetings with school runs.
He’s up at 3 a.m. rocking a crying baby so mom can rest.
He even takes leave from work when his child has a fever.
Meet the 21st-century dad—not just a provider, but a caregiver, a partner, and often, a co-parent in the truest sense of the word.
The image of the father as a distant disciplinarian or sole breadwinner is fading fast. Today’s dads are stepping up at home, just as moms have stepped up at work. But even as these roles evolve, the system around them hasn’t caught up.
Here’s the surprising truth: fathers are struggling too—and silently so.
What the Research Tells Us
According to the 2023 “State of the World’s Fathers” report by Equimundo:
- 85% of fathers say they are willing to do whatever it takes to be more involved in early childcare.
- And yet, less than half take any parental leave, even where it is offered.
- Why? The barriers include:
- Lack of paid paternity leave or fear of workplace penalties for using it.
- Deeply ingrained gender norms, where caregiving is still considered “women’s work.”
- Economic insecurity, especially in households where men are expected to be the primary earners.
What Indian Fathers Told Us in the Happy Mom Project Survey
We surveyed over 600 urban Indian fathers, and here’s what we learned:
- 57% of working dads said they feel guilty for not spending enough time with their kids.
- At the same time, 53% feel guilty for not giving as much to their professional work as their child-free colleagues.
- 76% said they want to do more at home but feel they lack the ability to multitask or manage it all.
- 67% wish to support their wives’ careers more actively post-childbirth.
- More than 40% feel that their contribution at home is undervalued.
- And notably, 91% of dads said they spend more quality time with their kids than their own fathers ever did.
The Double Burden of Modern Fatherhood
Today’s dads are caught in a tough spot. On one hand, they are expected to be emotionally present and hands-on with their kids. On the other, many workplaces still assume they are unaffected by family life and expect undivided loyalty. The result? A pressure cooker of guilt, exhaustion, and unmet expectations.
This isn’t just their problem. It’s everyone’s.
Because when fathers are unsupported in their parenting roles, mothers bear the brunt. A father who can’t take leave, who feels invisible at home, or who is stretched too thin, simply can’t be the equal partner that modern families need.
The Way Forward: Support for Fathers = Support for Mothers
If we want women to thrive—in careers, in motherhood, and in life—we must normalize caregiving for men. That means:
- Ensuring paid and stigma-free paternity leave. Mandate Equal Parental Leave: Legislation should ensure equal and well-structured paternity and maternity leave, which has proven to enhance female workforce participation by at least 6.8%.
Creating workplace cultures that recognize fathers as caregivers, not just as employees.
Caregiving should be valued and supported for all parents, not just women. Flexible and remote working options, childcare benefits and parenting support should be provided to both male and female employees.
Designing inclusive public infrastructure and facilities to become more even to accommodate men’s caregiving roles. That would imply installing diaper change facilities in men’s restrooms or building family toilets in public spaces.
- Promoting media narratives that show engaged, emotionally present fathers. The historical narrative of fathers being “incompetent” or “clumsy” must change
Empowering fathers isn’t a nice-to-have. It’s a must-have—not just for dads, but for the women and children in their lives.
Ellenomics 
Nice post and some great suggestions 👍